If I could be any other writer, I
always wanted to be Dear Abby. Dishing
out homespun advice and Jewish wisdom to the confused masses seemed like a
dream job. I was Abby’s biggest fan and
one day I got to meet her. I was writing
on a new family sitcom created by Erma Bombeck.
Erma was the Executive Producer of “Maggie” and she was the sweetest and
easiest boss I ever had. Erma knew
absolutely everybody. Behind Erma’s desk was hung an enormous patchwork quilt,
each square containing a famous person’s autograph embroidered. The daily parade of luminaries who came to take
Erma to lunch was amazing – one day in walked Ann Richards, the governor of
Texas. But toping them all, for me, was
when Dear Abby walked in, resplendent in her trademark helmet hair.
Like every woman in America, I have
a treasure-trove of yellowing Abby columns on my fridge and I insisted on recounting
them to Abby before I would let Abby and Erma leave for their lunch. Abby was more than gracious while I ticked
them off.
Here
are a few of my Abby faves:
1. A poem called FORGIVNESS
The friend who ran off with your
wife, Forgive him for his lust, The chum who sold you phony stocks, Forgive his
breach of trust; The pal who schemed behind your back, Forgive his evil work;
And while you’re done, forgive yourself for being such a jerk.
2. “Regret is the cancer of life.”
3. A story about a teacher who had
her students write down one good thing about each person in the class. The teacher then copied them over and gave
each student a list of 30 positive things others had said about them. An Abby reader died and the list was found in
his wallet. He had carried it for forty
years.
4. Letter writer Lois in New York
didn’t ask for Abby’s advice but sent some of her own pearls of wisdom about
not trusting male nurses because “men are the adulterers, the child molesters
of the world…” I thought Lois that was
pretty funny and I guess so did Abby. Abby
will be missed.
Karyl, sad in San Diego
